Episode 229: Mixed Neurotype Couples: Before and After Diagnosis [featuring Thomas Kear and Lauren Sanderson]
In this episode, Patrick Casale talks with Thomas Kear and Lauren Sanderson, founders of neuroduo, about being in a mixed neurotype relationship, navigating ADHD and Autism, whether diagnosed or not. This conversation is packed with real-life reflections on neurodiversity, partnership, and communication.
Here are 3 key takeaways:
- Understanding Yourself First is Crucial: Before you can support your partner, you need to understand and learn about your own neurodivergence—only then can you communicate your needs and work together.
- Communication Styles Can Be Wildly Different: The “Thunderstorm and Turtle” analogy for mixed neurotype partnerships (ADHD and Autistic) is a powerful reminder that urgency and withdrawal can clash, but knowledge and compassion make repair possible.
- Diagnosis Brings Validation, Not Instant Solutions: Getting an Autism or ADHD diagnosis doesn’t change who you are overnight, but it does give you the language and understanding you need to stop blaming yourself—and to ask for what you need.
More about Thomas and Lauren:
We’re Lauren and Tom, a neurodivergent couple living in Queenstown, New Zealand. After both receiving ADHD diagnoses as adults (Tom also with Autism and OCD a year prior), we launched neuroduo – a platform to share our lived experiences with ADHD and Autism. Through storytelling, humour, and real talk, we help others feel seen, understood, and empowered.
Our aim is to educate, empower, and advocate for neurodivergent people by sharing real, lived experiences and building more inclusive spaces — one conversation at a time.
- Instagram: instagram.com/neuroduo
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Thanks to The Receptionist for iPad for sponsoring this episode.
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Doubt yourself. Do it anyway. See you in Maine.
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Mentioned in this episode:
Portland, Maine, Summit 2026
The 2026 Doubt Yourself Do It Anyway Summit is happening for the first time in the United States in beautiful Portland, Maine, on September 1st–3rd, 2026. Portland, Maine, is a beautiful coastal city in the Atlantic Ocean. There's a lot of history there, and it's a very funky, creative, safe, walkable, diverse, and progressive city. You will get 9 NBCC CEs. We have ASWB pending—we'll make an announcement when that's finalized—and have 13 prolific industry leaders. This summit has always been about showing that our skills are applicable in so many different ways, and to motivate you to think bigger, grow in this profession, take more risks, work through self-doubt, and really embrace the doubt-yourself-do-it-anyway mentality. Spots are limited. Reserve your spot here: https://www.empoweredescapes.com/portland-maine-summit Doubt yourself. Do it anyway. See you in Maine.
The Receptionist for iPad
The Receptionist for iPad is a HIPAA-ready digital check-in system that eliminates the need to walk back and forth from your office to the waiting room to see if your next appointment has arrived. Clients or patients can check in for their appointments, and you'll be immediately notified by text, email, or your preferred channel. Break free from interruptions and make the most of your time, because it is valuable. Start a free 14-day trial of the Receptionist for iPad by going to https://thereceptionist.com/privatepractice. Make sure to start your trial with that link to get your first month free if you decide to sign up.
